Old Blog Archive: Star Wars - in 3D?

This blog entry was originally posted on my now defunct Star Wars.com blog. I am now archiving it for posterity in my new, improved, and free blog.

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We all love Star Wars. Why else would you be in the StarWars.com blogs? But is Star Wars in 3D really a good thing? I mean, who wants to see all sides of Jar Jar? OK, maybe the guys won't mind the "Leia in Bikini" scenes, or Padme in Episode II, but still...

I would be happy with simply a theater re-release. Being a fan for only three years, I saw only Episode III in theaters. I would be thrilled to experience the Original Trilogy, as well as the other Prequels, at 5 bucks a pop and with gum on the bottom of my seat. Of course, the huge screen and surround sound wouldn't be so bad either, for someone that lives in a hicktown with a 13 year old TV, and speakers older than that.

Now, don't get me wrong, I wouldn't mind Star Wars in 3D. In fact, I think it would be great! However, some of my friends think it would be horrible. I don't understand that view, so please, tell me why. Post comments... Who really does want to see Star Wars in 3D? And who doesn't? And why?

Let's figure this out, people!

Old Blog Archive: Star Wars characters lost to history

This blog entry was originally posted on my now defunct Star Wars.com blog. I am now archiving it for posterity in my new, improved, and free blog.

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Some characters in the Star Wars saga are so well known, that even if you don't speak the same language as anyone in the room, speak the name, and everyone knows who you're talking about. However, there are the Star Wars characters that even the biggest geek you know wouldn't recognise. Here is a partial list, with short biographies of each:

* Darth Brooks - This is one of the least successful Sith Lords known to history - at least in the Dark Side. Darth Brooks was a Sith apprentice since he was born, and when he finally became a Sith Lord, he broke out in song. A talent scout by the name of Cimon Sowell happened to be passing by, and thought he sounded so great that he immediately gave him a holo deal. You can recognize Darth Brooks by his sinister black face-mask and the cowboy hat. He is now retired. Again.

* Jackel Michson - Jabba The Hutt's unfortunate dancing... er, something. A humanoid of an unknown species and origin, it is the only one of Jabba's Slave Dancers that actually was killed by Jabba himself. When Jackel was tossed down in the Rancor pit, the Rancor ran away. No one else would touch Jackel, so Jabba has to strangle Michson by himself.

* Billton Clin - The only Supreme Chancellor to own Twi'lek slaves of his own. Unfortunately, slave were illegal on Coruscant, so he had to keep their existence hidden. When faced with the evidence, he denied all accusations. When Governor Valorum - who would succeed him - freed the slaves, Billton went into hiding on Tatooine, where he bought yet more slaves. Later, both he and his slaves wrote books about their experiences.

* Bill Setag - the richest human in the Republic, Bill owned about 90 % of the galaxy at one point in time. When many beings on the worlds that he owned started getting 99.99% more viruses than beings on the other planets, and turning a bright indigo, sreaming, and dying (called by some "The Blue Scream of Death"), the government decided to confiscate the world. Bill Setag bribed them to change their minds, however, and he promised to have a new climate out for all the worlds that would get rid of all the bugs. He died, however, before his goal could be accomplished, when he came down with the Blue Scream of Death himself. As soon as he died, everything reverted back to normal on the planets. Some say that Macintosh Apples cured the disease.

Old Blog Archive: Geeks Unite!

This blog entry was originally posted on my now defunct Star Wars.com blog. I am now archiving it for posterity in my new, improved, and free blog.

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Why does everyone assume that if you're a Star Wars fan, you're also a geek? OK, so in my case they're right, but still...

I have been a Star Wars fan for a little over four years now (I first saw Star Wars when I was early-teen - it was love at first sight), and in that time, I have also learned a whole lot of website programming, from HTML to CSS to ASP - heck, I have the whole alphabet of languages. Plus, I am on my third PDA (Try the Sony Clies, they're great!) and I am still plowig through the exanded universe.

I am proud of being a geek! geekiness is nothing to be ashamed of! geeks unite!

Old Blog Archive: Destiny has a whole new meaning - Part II

This blog entry was originally posted on my now defunct Star Wars.com blog. I am now archiving it for posterity in my new, improved, and free blog.

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Anakin was destined to become a Sith. We all know that. But, why? And who was his father? After seeing Episode III for the 200th time, the theory has been updated - with some help from the comments on my previous entry.

So... what did my readers say? It was something akin to:

"There is no analysis just give up on the whole father thing Anakin had no father and there was no way Plagueis had anything to do with Anakin being borning as it was said plenty of times it was the will of the force Anakin is suppose to be the Jesus of the Starwars Universe that got suckerd believeing a lie from Sidous so stop putting this out of context k."

For those who actually had constructive criticizm, or gramatically correct comments, read on.

So... some of the (good) comments pointed out that Plagueis died 100s of years ago. How could he have created Anakin? Well, think of what Palpatine said - "The power to cheat death was only acheived by my former master..." Sideous never said he couldn't create life, only cheat death. It is possible that Palpatine created Anakin... so Anakin's "father-figure" thoughts on Palpatine weren't so far off the mark.

We'll see...

Old Blog Archive: Destiny has a whole new meaning

This blog entry was originally posted on my now defunct Star Wars.com blog. I am now archiving it for posterity in my new, improved, and free blog.

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Anakin was destined to become a Sith. We all know that. But, why? And who was his father? After seeing Episode III for the second time (quite a while ago) I put two and two together - and came up with four and a half.

Let's start with what we know, first of all:

(1) Anakin was born a slave on the planet Tatooine.
(2) His mother knew of no father - which means that either there was none, or she got drunk and/or enjoyed some Death Sticks. There is no in between.
(3) If the Jedi hadn't found him he would have never been trained to use the force - or the Sith would have gotten him.

Now in Episode III, Palpatine was telling Anakin about Plagueis and how "...he could influence the midichlorians to create... life." He then went on to hint at how Padme could be saved, and that point was lost in Anakin's head.

So, lets do a little hypothesis here -

If Plagueis did learn how to create life (and was not simply Palpatine's bluff), it makes sense that he would want to make a new apprentice, one more powerful than any other. He could also use it as an exercise to teach his current apprentice how to do so. But Plagueis is not stupid. He knows that if the new apprentice is born within the Republic's control, he would be whisked away and trained as a Jedi, and the Sith would be doomed. So Plagueis simply chose a mother in an outlying system, in the far reaches of the galaxy - one that could never bring her child to be a Jedi. A slave on Tatooine would be a perfect target. Besides, no one would question it - chances are, that most slaves on Tatooine don't have a perfect reputation.

He focuses on a certain Shmi Skywalker. He probably discovers her by either going on a scouting mission or sending his apprentice to do so. Not only does she fit his criteria, she is also fairly strong in the midichlorian count as well.

Fast forward nine years and nine months. Plagueis is dead. After his experiment becomes a sucess, his apprentice decides that he has nothing else to learn, and kills him. A few hundred years of apprenticeship is plenty. Palpatine is keeping an eye on young Anakin, as his mother named him. He is learning all the skills he'll need - anger, fear, aggression, everything that comes along with being a slave. Plus, his Force sensitivity is even more than Palpatine could have hoped for. In a year or two, once Maul is out of the way, he will go to Tatooine and fetch his prize.

Unfortunately, Jedi get in the way of his plans - again. If that stupid slime of a Nemodian could have been a little heavier on the trigger, everything would have gone as planned. But the Jedi were hardly singed, and happened to stop on Tatooine - and discovered Palpatine's future ward. He would have to think of a way to get to him.

Ten years fly by, and finally an opportunity is shown, by the name of Padme Amidala. Palpatine nudges them together skillfully, at tha same time driving the Republic apart.

Three more years, and his plan comes to a completion, better than he had hoped. This time, he didn't get his apprentice and then start slowly taking over the Republic, now his Empire. He killed two womp rats with one blast - although, his prize did get damaged in the process. Oh, well. Maybe he has a son somewhere...